yolospat.me
When you are not fed love on a silver spoon you will learn to lick it off of knives.
by Lauren Eden
I’m grateful for the place I am today. My past was hard and ugly. My future is mine and its colorful and full of life. Unconditional love matters. It matters.
The snow finally came. Still not as much as we hoped but it was the best kind of snow. Perfect for snowballs, snowmen and forts!
I’ve struggled with depression and anxiety my whole life. I’ve been on different medications and I’ve tried some herbal/natural remedies for relief. Some options seemed to work for a while but there were always some really negative effects no matter which one I tried.
I’ve been on a new one now for 3 weeks and it’s taken me until this third week to really sit back and say, wow. I’m really feeling better. I actually feel better.
Changes that I’ve noticed:
I would say at this point I haven’t noticed anything negative. I’m excited to see where I am a month from now.
My sister, Darci, surprised me yesterday by sending me this beautiful shelf for my art studio! There are so many special features about it that I love. It’s not square. I love all shapes, except square ones. Thank you, sis, not only does it match the slope of my ceiling, I can be in my space and always be looking at how beautiful this is and think of you. As above, so below.
The last week here has been beautiful weather-wise. Clear sunny days, minimal clouds, upper 60’s. My kids have been in summer clothes for the majority of it. I’ve even shut off the heat several times. It’s been nice and spring is starting to poke it’s head out.
So this morning I’m getting text messages from family and friends in the area to start stocking up, snow storm coming. Then I got an AccuWeather notification on my phone about it. The headline read “Worst Colorado snow storm since 1885” talking about how my area is going to get up to 3 feet of snow. I know that 3 feet of snow to just anyone might sound like a lot, and it is, especially all at once. But it’s not that far fetched when you live in Colorado. I can think of 4 different snows in my lifetime that totaled around three feet or so. Has there really not been this big of one in 136 years?
I just don’t know if I believe it, yet. That’s not to say I haven’t prepared or that I’m not prepared. I am. I feel comfortable with what we have if we are snowed in for a few days. I guess I’m more worried about if our little Bunny Foo Foo will be okay and weather the storm. I look forward to the pictures and stories we will tell if it turns out to be the big one.
I feel like the days I have to deal with people and business are more work than anything. I despise the telephone and being on the telephone. It’s almost like a magnet for my children when they see me on the phone, an open invitation to make as much noise as possible and be as needy as a newborn. I got thru it and still got a lot done.
I let my driver’s license expire and didn’t realize it. I thought for sure I’d have to go in and retake the driving test but I was able to renew it online and pay a small fee. I had to get Zahkya’s birth certificate because after 3 years I still hadn’t done that. Again, you can easily do it online, which I did. Small fee. I was able to sign up for another health insurance and that was easy peasy too. Getting business done has never been this easy or stress-free before. Feels good. I think sometimes we procrastinate so long that the problem becomes way bigger and more daunting than it is. I know I do that quite a bit and I’m trying to shed that type of behavior in my later years. I always have little people watching me set the example and I’m always aware of it.
The task that was the most fun was changing the nginx config to point my domain from yolospat.me/blog to yolospat.me. Cam walked me thru some commands and held my hand thru it since it’s been a decade since I had a terminal window up. Success!! Now, content content content.
So I joined a guild. Nothing wrong with the guild, at all. Great bunch of people, I’ve almost leveled to 60 again. I’m having a blast. I just have such limited time and due to my ADD, my interests change at a second’s notice. I started to unpack my art studio and I have it 3/4 of the way set up. Naw, maybe half set up. I’m actually hanging my art up for the first time. Never in my 40ish years have I ever hung up something I was proud of. I’m doing it now and it feels good. It’s extremely motivating. I started drawing free-hand again and it’s like I picked up where I left off. I just can’t immerse myself in it because of the endless distractions from the kids. I’m still woodburning.
I am still writing but I had a little mishap with my laptop and a spill so I’m calling around to see what can be done about it. I was there when it happened and the juice got cleaned off immediately, the MacBook works fine, there are a few keys that stick including the spacebar which makes typing impossible. I’m pretty sure a good cleaning is what it needs but I’m not willing or confident enough to pop open a MacBook case after a decade of not doing it. I know there are 100+ screws between me and taking the keyboard out to clean, not to mention a possible glued-in battery. I need help.
We also might have acquired a pet bunny. We have a lot of wild jackrabbits living around our property so it’s not unusual to see them out in the yard. The other night we got home and I see this bunny but the color is slightly different and its ears are bigger and it’s not skittish. It hopped right over to me and smelt my hand. I fed it of course because it came right up to the porch and everything. Seth got it a box and we cut a hole out. I posted to the Nextdoor app to see if anyone was missing a bunny but I had zero response. Here we 3 days later, his home has been slightly upgraded and moved to the area he likes most in the yard, up next to the garage and under the trailer. He gets fresh water, rabbit pellets, and fresh fruits and veggies daily. The kids have named him “Bunny Foo Foo.”
This is the first guild I’ve actively searched. I found them via Facebook group called “35 and older” and found they are a great bunch of people. At least so far. I’m happy to be part of a guild again. I played with my sister for a while but she’s developed vertigo and can’t play anymore and I got lonely. World of Warcraft really is better when you have friends. Hopefully, I make some, lol. So far so good.
Calming medicine for my mind. just got done burning this.
My hubby got me a wood burner a few years ago for Christmas. I was knee deep in Motherhood with a toddler and a newborn so any tasks other than care taking tiny humans wasn’t an option. So it’s sat on the shelf.
Fast forward to the world of TicTok in 2020. I watched a video about a girl who said, since we are all in pandemic lockdown try a new hobby like wood burning! Kids are a little older and slightly less needy so I dusted off my brand new never opened burner and tried it out. I’ve been doing it for about a month now. I think I’m obsessed 🤩
